More Info than Brains

Twitter is proof that even when you start with a terrific idea, and execute it well, it can still suck.

I was introduced to Twitter at SxSW this year, and instantly thought, “this is terrific.” In the mass-hipsterfuck that is South by Southwest, Twitter was the perfect way to, “at Red7 free Shiner and Sloan.” For that week twitter took a little bit of the “cluster” out of the fuck.

This was great, I could be constantly updated to my friends’ (yes, plural, asshole) locations and up-tos, and should I feel the need to … I could update them! All at once! Also, since the folks at Twitter fucking rule, they made it super easy to pump information into the system via SMS, AIM, or right on the website.

Then I realized that I could be constantly updated to my friend’s locations, up tos…. Fuck. Me. this is terrible.

I woke up Monday back in Michigan, sweating 100% blue agave and hoping that I would still remember how to tie a shoe. I most certainly didn’t care if Jen was having waffles with someone in Chicago, but Twitter felt that I cared enough to text me.

I thought, “wow, that’s cool… but what I really want to know is what my Atlanta crew thinks of traffic this morning.”

In the few short hours before I quickly unsubscribed exactly 100% of my friends, I realized that Twitter is a metaphor for the More Info than Brains problem. People get very excited about information, until the realize that most of the information in the world is completely useless, and we’re better off not wasting our time – like the fact that John successfully hailed a cab on 5th Ave, and it seems cleaner than most.

The Internet is rife with things that seem extremely exciting and revolutionary due to their complexity and advancement *cough*googlestreetview*cough* but they have the practicality of a slap-bracelet.